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Watching Some Anime

I have been pulling a Steven Den Beste and watching some Japanese Anime lately. I am on disc 3 of Full Metal Panic. One issue I have is with the depiction of the "Captain". Here is a screen shot:



Now, after 16 years of active and reserve duty, I not once served under such a piece of ass well put together officer. Unless you count Lt. Nakajima (or some such Japanese name). She was so hot her hair burst into flames... Oops, that was a couple of posts ago. Anyway, one day I found her water bottle in the fridge and snuck a sip. I know, sophmoric and stupid but I didn't wash my lips for a week after that.

Full Metal Panic (what does the mean, anyway?) is not too bad I guess. Kind of sophmoric and silly but that shouldn't disqualify me from watching it.

Oh, and here is our Heroine and her friend:




I can also look back on my school career and realize I never went to school with something like either of these.

You know, I don't think that Full Metal Panic is all that close to the truth... I guess the giant fighting robots should have given it away.

posted by corsair the rational pirate at 21:46

Good Looking Movie

At least the actresses are good looking:



It appears to be one of those wacky Indian-American fish out of water singing-and-dancing extravaganzas. Not that there is anything wrong with that.



I am sure Mrs. Corsair and I will be Netflixing it.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 08:55

Irrational Stupidism

This is what I am talking about, the cockroaches start coming out of the woodwork after a disaster:

On the Web site IslamOnline.net, someone from Belgium asked the geologist Zaghloul el Naggar: "Is there any religious meaning that we can take from a country being affected by tidal waves? Is this a punishment from Allah to these people? Or is it a test? How do we know when a form of natural disaster or phenomenon is a test or a form of punishment from Allah to the people?"

Why does it have to be a test or a form of punishment? Sometimes a cigar really is just a cigar and this was just a natural phenomena. It just happened. Don't get your panties in such a twist trying to figure out the bigger meaning. Or would you really like to be the one bowing down to some tyrant who kills 120,000 people just as a "test"?

Not that this tool is any better:

Shlomo Amar, Israel's Sephardi chief rabbi, has said, "This is an expression of God's great ire with the world. The world is being punished for wrongdoing -- be it people's needless hatred of each other, lack of charity, moral turpitude."

OK, how about you just shut the fuck up? I want nothing to do with someone rationalizing the drowning of uncounted babies and little children.

And finally, what listing of utter and complete retards would be complete without a representative of the biggest bunch of rationalizers:

On his Web site Watch.org, Bill Koenig writes: "The Biblical proportions of this disaster become clearly apparent upon reports of miraculous Christian survival. Christian persecution in these countries is some of the worst in the world." Eight of the 12 countries hit -- Malaysia, Burma, Bangladesh, Somalia, Maldives, Sri Lanka, India and Indonesia, he says -- "are among the top 50 nations who persecute Christians."

Koenig, who lives in Alexandria and started the site in 1996, sees the South Asian disaster as an example of Christian exceptionalism. "What happened, and we see this happen over and over again, was that Christians, supernaturally, have been able to escape from harm's way," says the self-described Christian fundamentalist. " 'For then there will be great tribulation, such as has not been since the beginning of the world until this time, no, not ever shall be,' " he says, quoting from Matthew 24:21.

Too bad Christians aren't able to escape from this deluded idiot's ramblings as easily as they can get out of being swept out to sea by tsunamis. So did this guy personally interview each and every tsunami victim to determine that they weren't "good Christian" and so deserved their fate? And what is up with the "8 out of 50" countries business? If Jeebus was such a badass protecting his slavish followers, shouldn't he have dropped rocks on Saudi Arabia, North Korea, and Sudan?

This guy gets gets closer to reality:

Sutadhara Tapovanaye, a Buddhist monk for 38 of his 48 years, tries to explain it differently. This, he says, is a part of life, the dynamics of nature, an always-changing world.

Once again, idiots. Sometimes shit happens and it has no meaning, no reason, and is not related to your limited world views at all. So just shut up already and get with the reconstructing.

Sheesh.

UPDATE: Ahh, the good folks over at lucianne.com (here are some more of your fellow travelers, jtb-in-texas, I am sorry to say) never fail to sink to the lowest levels of Christian irrationality. A few comments on the awful destruction caused/abetted/allowed by their "loving" god:

Reply 43 - Posted by: Tulsa, 12/31/2004 10:24:24 AM

It's not about us.

It was never about us.

It is about Him.

'The wisdom of the world is foolishness before God.'

God uses pain and disaster and trials and tribulations to get our attention. Some submit to God as a result and have eternal life, some never do. God requires total submission. You must love and honor him more than anyone or any thing on this earth.

None of us die one second b4 God wills it. God willed every single one of these people to die at their appointed time.

Does He have your attention yet?

Ah, the old "get your attention" defense. How's about putting up some billboards or raining frogs down on Pat Robertson's house. Killing off 150,000 people to get some "attention" seems to be on par with a 3-year old lying on the floor kicking and screaming. Yeah, that makes me want to "submit" (oddly, that is what "Islam" means) to something that crazy.

Reply 49 - Posted by: mrduc, 12/31/2004 11:58:17 AM

I'm glad to see that President Bush is in such excellent company. I am so tired of the prevailing attitude that when something bad happens, God did it. God had nothing to do with this; poop happens, Life happens, we live, we die, some heed God's lessons, some turn their backs on Him and follow Satan. God gave us choices. Funny how when disasters occur, God did it, but when good things take place, we did it all by our little ol' selves. IMHO, there's not one among us that doesn't need to eat a heaping plate of Humility, and then thank our Father for everyday that He gives us, and whatever those days include; hurricanes, birthdays, monsoons, promotions, sorrow, and joy.

The liberal littany: God did this, George Bush did it, it's all those Christians' fault, big bad America is to blame....Gack.

Huh? Mrduc is seriously out of touch with reality. If he would read the comments half of them say "it wasn't god" the other half say "it was god" but usually when something good happens to people (win the lottery, escape the burning church) it is ascribed to god's grace. Look at all the athelete tools pointing to space everytime they make a touchdown or home run.

Reply 51 - Posted by: old dinasaur, 12/31/2004 12:08:27 PM

God didn't do this. This world is the realm of Satan until Jesus returns and He allowed Satan to do it. As most of this part of the world is muslim why is the question 'why did you do this, God' instead of 'why did you do this, allah'. Interesting how people always blame God even when they don't accept Him or even believe in Him.
Further, if God does allow such things, then perhaps he does it because of people turning their back on Him.

This slope head is all over the map. First he claims that Satan did it. Then he says that Jeebus allowed Satan to do it. Then he said Allah did it. Then he says God did it because he is pissed at folks. Sounds like a gang to me! Time for a task force to take care of these evil-doers!

Reply 59 - Posted by: diehard, 12/31/2004 2:40:46 PM

Why don't we invite Him back into our schools and public buildings so we can all sit down and discuss these things with Him?

I'm sure He would be happy to attend such meetings.

There is a building where you can talk to hime all you want. It's called a church, idiot.

So I guess god killed all those people so that we would have prayer in schools? Are these people allowed to vote? And procreate?

Reply 61 - Posted by: punkinpie, 12/31/2004 3:21:17 PM

God is sovereign and there is a bigger picture. It will all work for good somehow... none of us are immune from natural disasters. All those lives that perished from the tiniest to the oldest were loved by someone and especially by God. They each held a place in so many other lives. Hopefully the intense sorrow will be an opportunity for many to turn to the living God or it will be an even greater disaster.

Hey, punkin! I love you. Give me your address so I can come over and kill you. Then your family will love me!

Reply 63 - Posted by: YY4U, 12/31/2004 3:30:38 PM

Maybe because you folks have been blowing up nightclubs and beheading Buddhists. Ever hear of a fellah named Noah?

Yeah, ever hear of a fellow called Rumplestiltskin? (Hey, you list your fairy tale, I'll list mine.)

Reply 68 - Posted by: veryrightofcenter, 12/31/2004 6:44:00 PM

I do wonder why so many natural disasters take place in the Indian Ocean region. One hardly hears of cyclones and tsunamis in Maryland, for example.

Again and again, disaster strikes the poorest nations on earth. India, Bangledesh, Sri Lanka... these people have nothing and then they die.

I have faith in God but I do wonder why these same peoples keep getting hit.

Ask your fellow Christians on this site. It is either because they follow satan, or don't follow god hard enough, or don't believe in Noah... or something. After wading through 68 replies I tend to get a little cross-eyed.

Reply 5 - Posted by: Emma Sansom, 12/30/2004 2:54:29 PM

I'm always bemused when supposedly religious people ask this question.

If the best thing that can happen to a person is to go to Heaven, why be upset when God calls someone home? Of course, there is an alternative destination....

In any case, death is NOT the worst thing that can occur.

I second that. The worst thing that can happen is to be Emma's neighbor when she gets all jeebusy and comes over to discuss the coming Judgement. You want to die screaming in agony as soon as you smell the burning fabric of her stretch pants where her blubbery thighs rub together as she scurries over to "save" you. *shudder*

Reply 26 - Posted by: scotty, 12/30/2004 5:10:25 PM

The original representatives of all humanity, Adam and Eve, abdicated Godly control of Earth when they disobeyed His command, and we have suffered ever since. The god of this world immediately became (taah daah) mr satan...the leader of atheists, evolutionists, humanists, false religions, demonrats, et al. Those screaming the loudest have no one to blame but their God-rejecting selves.

OK, I admit it, I did it. I have been both rejecting god and screaming loudly. I guess I broke something. Sorry.

This is kinda fun but it runs out after awhile. You can only look at some much superstions, stupidity, and ridicuousness before you start to despair of ever dragging this species out of the muck from which it came and which many find seem to wish to return.

*Sigh* It is like trying to hold the ocean back with a broom. And we all know what the ocean is capable of when it puts it mind to it.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 07:55

I Thought They Didn't Need Proof

Religious folks, when questioned about the validity of their often wacky claims that religion does not require proof, all it needs is faith. The ability to believe things that otherwise sane and rational people find to be silly and ridiculous is the main component in accepting religion. Noah's ark? Don't need proof, I just know my god would drown the world, kill everyone in it save one family, and float a boat filled with animals around for a year because I have faith in it and he wrote it down in a book.

But then they spend an inordinate amount of time and effort trying to prove their claims. Here is a whole site dedicated to "proving" though scientific analysis the whole stupid Noah story (talk about navel gazing).

They also like to have bits abd pieces of saints, spears, crosses, and such to prove that what they read about in their little book of fables actually happened. Being that there is so much gullibilty in the world, bad people have spent years taking advantage of wide-eyed believers. Like these guys:

JERUSALEM (AP) -- Experts advised world museums to re-examine their Bible-era relics after Israel indicted four collectors and dealers on charges of forging some of the most important artifacts of recent decades.

The indictments issued Wednesday labeled as fakes perhaps the two biggest biblical discoveries in the Holy Land -- the purported burial box of Jesus' brother James and a stone tablet with written instructions by King Yoash on maintenance work at the Jewish Temple -- and many other "finds."

If Jesus had a brother, shouldn't he have nieces and nephews? And whatever happened to the rest of the family?

But there is more:

Scholars said the forgers were exploiting the deep emotional need of Jews and Christians to find physical evidence to reinforce their faith. "This does not discredit the profession. It discredits unscrupulous dealers and collectors," said Eric Myers, an archaeology professor at Duke University in North Carolina.

I think it also discredits everyone who pops up every time one of these "miraculous" finds suddenly appears and begins claiming that it validates the bible and we should all get on our knees and ask Jeebus for forgiveness (from what, exactly? Oh, that's right we are all miserable sinners blah blah blah).

Once this or that relic is confirmed to be a fake, do all the believers recant their claims? Of course not, they are on to the next miracle cure or grilled cheese mother of god. They have the faith in the devine, they just need a little proof.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:17

Do Your Part

I dropped $50 in the international relief bucket, I suggest y'all do the same.

Amazon will be happy to take your money.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:34

Went for a Little Lunch

The guys down at the fire station have been wondering when I would make it over to the Crystal City Restaurant. CCR is the local "gentleman's club" (wife-concealing speak for a tittie bar... without the tits). Today was the day!

I wandered over about 11:30 and seemed to step back to Songtan, Korea! I entered the low-ceilinged, dark, long, narrow room and found myself a seat with a good view of the tiny-little-stage. There were only a couple of other degenerates there when I entered but I was happy to see a steady stream of customers arrive as I ate. I hope they supported the dancing girls with tips and CARE packages because some of those girls were unhealthily thin! And you could tell that because, despite the cold none of those girls was exactly dressed for the weather.

According to the laws of the Commonwealth of Virginia:

§ 4.1-325. Prohibited acts by mixed beverage licensees; penalty.

12. Allow any striptease act, or the like on the licensed premises;

13. Allow persons connected with the licensed business to appear nude or partially nude;

Well, isn't that a buzz kill! Of course the outfits that these girls chose to wear didn't leave all that much to the imagination. G-strings and band aids mostly. Of course they did start their sets with little dresses and skirts (is there a store that sells stripper-wear?) but these soon fell by the wayside. Interestingly, once their "dance" was done, most of them picked up their "clothes", turned their backs to the audience, and re-robed. Modest, I guess.

There was one particular girl there who was so hot her hair burst into flames!!! I kid you not! There she was a-writhing around on the stage like a python with gas when her hair slipped off the edge and straight into a candle sitting on a nearby table. If it weren't for an overly anxious Lothario hovering around her like a mother goose, her whole wig could have exploded! (I assume it was a wig, nothing else on her was real.)

All in all a productive lunch. Got to see some enhanced flesh, eat a burger and watch a girl re-enact the Michael Jackson Pepsi commercial. I highly reccomend it!

***
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 13:25

Fiction Rules Hollywood

No Titannics this year. All of the top movies were imaginary:

LOS ANGELES (AP) — The ogre, the superheroes, the savior and the wizard led Hollywood’s 2004 hit parade, with strong performances from a handful of films helping to offset a whole lot of duds.
.
Just five movies — “Shrek 2,” “Spider-Man 2,” “The Passion of the Christ,” “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” and “The Incredibles” — accounted for roughly one-sixth of Hollywood’s overall projected revenues of nearly $9.4 billion, according to box-office tracker Exhibitor Relations.

< /snark >
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 14:12

A Whole Lot of Blather

Sometime before Christmas, Safeway (the supermarket) decided that they were going to be open on December 25. They said they were going to ask for volunteers to work and open for some subset of their normal hours.

Oh the hue and cry of the Christians in the area was deafening! You can't be open on Christmas Day! That would cheapen the holiday! Safeway opens this year and everyone else will be forced to follow suit in coming years cheapening the meaning of the day! We need to spend this day with friends and family! Think of the workers forced to work (for triple time) on Christmas! What about the children?!

Well, Mom Corsair was over for Christmas morning where an unregulated orgy of baccanalian delights consumed our early morning hours (lots of present openings) then she had to stop at the store on her way home to buy some salad stuff for dinner later that night. Off to Safeway I sent her. It was closed. I checked the website and found the next closest one. That was closed. Finally I sent her to Grand Mart, one of the local Korean supermarkets and they were open. Of course.

I found myself having to run out for something later (cream cheese for a great Orange Cheesecake) so off to the Grand Mart I went. The place was more packed than I have ever seen it. Turns out that people really do need to eat on Christmas and might not be able to get to the store before then. There were people of all nationalities, colors, and sizes buying a variety of things.

Princess Corsair I asked Mrs. Corsair what Christmas was like in Korea and she replied that it really wasn't that big a deal. Want to bet that that same attitude comes to the US from many other countries around the globe? The Washington DC area is a conglomeration of people from here, there, and everywhere. I imagine for many of them, Christian and not, Christmas isn't really all the important and they would rather get out and get something to eat than sit around in forced idleness partaking in a celebration that means nothing to them.

So thank you immigrant community without which my Orange Cheeesecake would have never seen the light of day.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 11:39

Arrrgh

The local talk radio station just finished an hour of morons debating whether a school district in Pennsylvania should have the ability to teach Intelligent Design alongside of evolution. The host get going on about "evolution is just a theory so why not teach another theory"... Argh. And then the morons that called up to support him: "there are no transitional fossils", "it's only a theory", "ID folks are just as educated as evolutionists", etc.

People who know not of what they speak should just shut up. Oops, there go bloggers.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 13:07

Scary Picture

Princess Corsair II has decided she is going to be a cosmetologist or hairdresser or makeup artist. Being but two-years old I keep hoping she will change her mind. I was thinking biologist, financial planner, or astronaut. I guess there is still time to change her mind.

A friend of Mrs. Corsair thought she would bolster my daughter's future plans by providing a makeup set. This of course led to:



Awww, isn't she cute. What is not so photogenic is the following:



Those would be pirate tootsies. Pretty frightening, huh? The worst part was not finding any nail polish remover in the house and having to spend the day with these monstrosities. I had planned to visit the gym and get a workout in sometime today but the thought of everyone in the locker room pointing and laughing at my toes put the kibosh on that idea.

So off I went to Safeway and bought the remover and things are almost back to normal.


posted by corsair the rational pirate at 22:58

Taking the Day Off

I decided that the US government can get along without me for the day. So I am not at work. I spent the night at the station (total calls: 0) and now get to spend four days at home with the family.

While we are looking for a White Christmas, we appear to be heading for a Wet Christmas.

As I notice moronic things happening in the world around me, I will try to rush to the computer and let you know about them.

If I don't, have a Happy Christmas!
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 08:06

Oh, Man. Now That is a Headline!

Here is a headline you don't read everyday:

Zamboni explodes; fire destroys arena

I immediately thought of Islamic terrorists. Then I thought of Irish terorists. Then I thought of Basque speratists. Then I thought the whole thing was just silly.

Too bad about the arena, though.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:17

Uhm, Almost Infantile Obsession

Not quite bellybutton time... But I am kinda glad it isn't.



The way she is wacking herself in the the chin doesn't say much for her training.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 08:41

Damn! But It Is Cold Out There!

It was 10° (does the little degree thingy on this machine work?) when I left the house. Plenty of wind and nastiness when I was waiting for the Metro. Slow trains due to incompetance (just an average day here in DC) and a cold office building when I finally got in.

Welcome to winter (oops, a day early).
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 07:31

I was Listening to the Radio

I was listening to some show on the radio and they were discussing the virgin birth of Jesus. The expert had all this historical and religious data to back up his claim that this fairytale was true. Then we went to the phones.

The first mouth-breather who called in said that he believed the truth of the virgin birth because liberals were trying to ban nativity scenes from public places.

Huh? If you are going to believe in nonsense, I guess your reasoning has to be nonsense too.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 15:56

Money Quote

Here ya go:

If you'll pray for me, is it all right if I think for you?

posted by corsair the rational pirate at 13:07

Crushing the "Christmas" Spirit

We have all seen the recent uptick in stories (sheesh, here is one written by a Jew!) recently deploring the state of "Christ"mas in America today. All those secular, atheist multiculti types who want to take Christmas and return it to the days of the Winter Soltice Festival (whilst dancing around a pole or slaughtering goats, one assumes), denying good Christians the ability to surround themselves with images, sounds, and experiences that have nothing to do with Christ.

Anyway. I experienced that very same thing myself last night! The crushing of the spirit of students continues unabaited, apperently, in our county school system. Corsair Jr. plays the flute in the sixth grade band so he had to partake in the "Winter Concert" (an obvious clue there!).

Before the over-clarineting of Jingle Bells and Good King Wenceslas (what is up with the popularity of clarinets?) we were forced - forced I tell you - to listen to the likes of Hannukah Dance (see! I told you! Its the Jooooooooooos!), Non Nobis Domine (probably means "Kill all the Good Christians" in pagan talk), and Stille Nacht (Kraut for "Still Haven't Killed Everyone Yet" I think) and Carol of the Bells (I am not sure who Carol was and the song wasn't real clear either).

So, obviously the Teacher's Union, PETA, and Charles Darwin's ghost now run the schools in my area and religious folks are not wanted!

UPDATE: Hey! Wait a minute! Someone snuck in that Nobis stuff and didn't tell anyone!

Non nobis, Domine, Domine
Non nobis, Domine.
Sed *nomine*, sed nomine
Tuo da gloriam.

Turns out it means:

Give glory not to us, Lord, but to your name.

Seems highly religious to me. Maybe I better go back and check that the building that I was in last night wasn't a church!

UPDATE II:Damn foreigners. Why can't eveyone speak Enlish? It also turns out that Stille Nacht is just German for Silent Night! And we all know what that is about (I am not sure I can reveal it's true nature lest the Secular Police come round to castigate me. But I can say it has something to do with "You-Know-Who"-Mas).

So right there in front of all those women and children (think of the children!) were people getting their religion on in a school environment! Sure they had to resort to subterfuge and trickery to do it but at no time did the forces of Humanism and Infidelism rush into the auditorium to force everyone to read Darwin and renounce horoscopes. The whole thing went off without a hitch, actually.

Maybe things aren't as bad as the poor, hysterical, martyered Christians would have us believe... At least in my little part of the country.

UPDATE: This column at Reason.com echos my thoughts exactly (and much more competently, I might add):

It's a Christmas tradition as venerable as mistletoe and caroling: As the days grow shorter, conservative activists claiming to speak for American Christendom raise their voices, not for a rousing round of "Good King Wenceslaus," but to complain that the roughly 75
to 80 percent of Americans who profess allegiance to some denomination or another of Christianity constitute a cruelly oppressed minority.

The kvetching is especially loud this year, with a spate
of stories chronicling the outrage over a particularly insidious form of anti-Christian bigotry: the Satanic phrase "happy holidays."

posted by corsair the rational pirate at 07:15

Take That, Stupid Blockbuster Tards!

Seems like little ole Blockbuster is starting to feel the hurt from NetFlix:

NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - Blockbuster Inc. announced Tuesday it is abolishing late fees on all its video tapes, DVDs and video games as of Jan. 1.

The world's largest video rental company will still have due dates for their rental products -- one week for games and two days or one week for movies, depending on whether it's a new release.

I hated going to Blockbuster since there were numerous times that my lazy self couldn't get the stupid DVD back to them in the required amount of time. So they hit you with a penalty that cost as much as the original rental! They did it because they could and they made a ton of money on it:

It estimated that late fees would have contributed about $250 million to $300 million to revenue next year.

300 million!?! That'a a hell of a lot of late fees.

And then I switched to Netflix. Not only do I get a better selection, I also get the thing sent to my house, I only have to return it to my mailbox, I get three movies at a time, and I can keep them as long as I want. Sure, I can't do impulse rentals. And maybe the wait for new movies is longer. So what?! I can get a lot of classic movies, and the children's section of Blockbuster is normally stocked with old copies of Smurf TV shows! Now I can choose from thousands (and not a Smurf in sight).

Of course Blockbuster had to find a way to get some money out of this:

The world's largest video rental company will still have due dates for their rental products -- one week for games and two days or one week for movies, depending on whether it's a new release.

But customers will be given a one-week grace period after that to return the product. After that grace period ends, the chain will automatically sell them the product, less the rental fee. If the customers don't want to purchase the movie or game, they can return the product within 30 days for a credit, less a restocking fee.

You rent it you own it! Did you catch that last part? If you are late they will take you money automatically, if you return the delinquent DVD they will refund a "credit". Meaning that they keep your money and all you get is the chance to do business with this slimy oraganization in the future!

Throw away your Blockbuster cards and join Netflix! You have nothing to lose but late fees, bad service, long lines, no selection, high costs, and interaction with a bottom feeding corporation!
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 13:56

The Int@rweb am a Wunnerful Thing

I was reading a story this morning on the Metro about sandwich shops in the DC area when I came across the following:

"The low-carb craze is starting to peter out," Pawlak said. "People try eating that way, but then they cheat. They think, 'Maybe I'll just reduce my carbs, not cut them out entirely. Maybe I'll just skip dessert.' " Samantha Panda, a petite 20-year-old junior at George Washington University who was waiting in line recently at the Corner Bakery on 19th and L Streets NW, never bought into the low-carbohydrate craze. "A salad just doesn't do it for me," she said. "I like sandwiches during the day because they're portable and filling. If I eat a salad for lunch I get hungry within three hours."

I was immediately struck by the cool name, "Samantha Panda". So off to the intraweb I go and what do I find:



First, it is a whole page of hot Indian student babes and second the aforementioned Samantha Panda is prominently displayed therein!

Damn, is this thing great or what? Now, if I am wandering the streets of DC and happen to see Miss Panda I can come across as some kind of creepy stalker when I say "Good Morning!"
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 07:39

Been Watching a Lot of Mulan Recently

Princess Corsair II has decided that Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and Mulan are the only two cinematic endeavors worth watching.

Weighing the two, you have to admit that this:



which translates to this:



beats this:



Ming Na is da bomb!
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 09:53

Stupid Moron

Plenty of Christians spend most of December lamenting people who do not take the whole Jesus myth as seriously as they do. One charge they make is that schools are "throwing out Christianity" while letting everyone else's stories in. While they do have some valid points about this (it is Christmas, after all) they also tend to go overboard and throw around a lot of insinuations where none exist.

I was scolling by the Bill O'Reilly radio show (ewww) today when some moron made the claim that not only did the Montgomery County, Maryland school system hate Christians (since, I assume there is no school prayer, the crucifix does not hang up in all classrooms, and teachers aren't allowed to handle snakes and speak in tongues) they actively promote Islam by giving the students a Ramadan holiday!!! Oh, the perfidy! Bill, to his credit, questioned him on this and the guy repeated his claim. Bill then said that he would have to check on that.

Here is the Montgomery County, Maryland School holiday calendar:

July 5 Holiday* — Independence Day
Sept. 6 Holiday* — Labor Day
Sept. 16 Rosh Hashanah — No school for students and teachers
Nov. 2 Holiday* — General Election Day
Nov. 11 Early release day K-8** — Parent conferences, Veterans Day
Nov. 25-26 Holidays* — Thanksgiving
Dec. 24 Holiday* — Christmas
Dec. 27-30 Winter break — No school for pupils and teachers
Dec. 31 Holiday* — New Year's
Jan. 17 Holiday* — Martin L. King, Jr. Day
Feb. 21 Holiday* — Presidents Day
March 25 & 28 Holidays* — Easter
March 29-31, Apr. 1 Spring break — No school for students and teachers
May 30 Holiday* — Memorial Day

As you can see, no Ramadan. What you do see is Christmas and Easter. Get your facts straight before make wild-ass accusations and pulling the martyr routine.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 14:03

♫ I Got an Invite! ♫

I was despairing of ever getting a party invite this holiday season when what to my wondering eyes to I espie, but an advertisement in the paper directed at me!

I read the following and immediately ran out to get my Tux:

You are invited to...

It appears I was slightly premature in my excitement. Upon returning from the tux store, I completed reading my personal invite and found out that the "party" that I had so greatly invested my hopes and dreams was in fact... not.

You are invited to a Scoping Meeting for the Proposed Consolidation of Nuclear Operations Related to Production of Radioisotope Power Systems Environmental Impact Statement (Consolidation EIS)

Oh. Never mind.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 11:04

Judge, Jury, and Executioner

All the bleeding heart, liberal, anti-death penalty folks out there tell me why I, had I found the following going on in my 9-year old's bedroom, shouldn't kill this guy immediately:

It was 7:45 a.m. Sunday when the victim's mother heard noises and entered her daughter's room in the Silver Avenue home and found her child with the suspect, who was nude. He apparently entered an unlocked window of the home, police say.

The victim later told police that she was awakened to find a stranger in her bed and recounted an ordeal that lasted an hour in which she was raped and forced to engage in sex acts.

When she resisted his demands, he asked her if she wanted him to be "mean," which she understood to be a threat, authorities said.

After he was discovered, the suspect ran from the home, carrying a backpack. He quickly dressed and was soon chased by the victim's father, authorities said.

The suspect allegedly threw a rock at the child's father during a backyard confrontation, and threatened the father with a knife. The father then hit him with a 2-by-4 piece of lumber, police said.

I don't believe I would have stopped hitting this piece of shit. Not until I saw brains. Oh, not a piece of shit, you say?

Gamero, a prior sex offender who was on probation for an earlier domestic violence case in San Mateo County, now faces charges of aggravated sexual assault of a child, child molestation, false imprisonment and burglary stemming from the attack, which shocked veteran investigators.

I would have been arrested and charged with something like manslaughter or jaywalking or something and then I would have gone before the jury and pled my case.

I don't think there is a jury in the land that would have sent me to jail. If there is, I feel sorry for the citizens of that part of this great land.

This piece of shit now gets three hots and cot for the rest of his life while the 9-year old lives in fear of strangers, windows, Hispanics, and men for the rest of hers.

Gamero is jailed on a probation hold and $1 million bail. He is scheduled to be arraigned today. If convicted of all charges, Gamero could face a sentence of 25 years to life, said Debbie Mesloh, spokeswoman for District Attorney Kamala Harris.

posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:31

Irrational Moron Alert

Whoop whoop whoop!

This is an easy one. What are the Federal Air Marshalls?

* The Sky Marshal program was introduced in the 1970s to prevent hijackings in Cuba. Further refined during the Reagan administration in 1985, it became the Federal Air Marshal program of today: A highly trained group of specialized agents responsible for protecting passengers and crew in the event of a plane hijacking.
* Federal Air Marshals disguise themselves as ordinary travelers to maintain a low profile and blend in with passengers aboard high-risk routes worldwide on US carriers. It is impossible to cover all flights so their assignments are unknown in an effort to discourage hijackings overall.
* Having limited contact with family members during missions, agents can be deployed at anytime and anywhere in the world.
* Marshals are authorized to carry firearms on planes and make arrests without warrants with the objective of using minimum force to achieve maximum security.

They are basically the undercover cops of the flying world. You would therefore expect them to dress like this:


Since this is the sort of person I frequently travel with I would expect the FAMs to look something like this.

I would be wrong:

The dress code for marshals is described in a separate field-office memo as "conservative male or female attire, such as that worn by business persons in first-class seating," a business suit, or sports coat with dress pants and tie, or sports coat with dress pants and collared shirt.
The memo issued from the New York field office requires marshals flying into Washington to also wear ties.
"FAMS will present a professional image and blend into their environment by maintaining a standard of dress that enables them to perform their mission without drawing undue attention to themselves," the New York memo says.

"without drawing undue attention to themselves"?!? How does traveling whilst dressed like a Sears mannequin allow you to not draw attention to themselves? How about they dress like this (click to see bigger pic):



This is just a story about a martinet who is more interested in stlye over substance and will, in all probability end up getting someone killed becuase of it. In case suit-biy hasn't travelled reacently, the instance of folks emplaning with a Brooks Brother's on is getting smaller and smaller every day. Get with the program and let your FAMs wear sweatsuits and Big Johnson tee shirts like everyone else!
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:18

Who Woulda Thunk It?

It turns out that North Korea, that bastion of truth and liberty, has misled the poor Japanese on the disposition of some mouldy old bones! What NoKo said the bones were turned out to be not exactly the complete and utter correct truth.

I'll post the quote once my jaw stops bouncing off the floor.

OK:

TOKYO (Reuters) - Japan protested to North Korea on Wednesday after finding the communist state had provided fake evidence about the fate of Japanese citizens it had abducted.

The Japanese embassy in Beijing lodged the protest with the North Korean delegation in the Chinese capital, a Japanese Foreign Ministry official said. The two nations have no diplomatic ties.

Earlier, the Japanese government's top spokesman said tests had confirmed that bones Pyongyang said were the remains of a Japanese abductee were not hers, and that as a result talks with North Korea had hit a major obstacle.

The major obstacle, of course is the fact that they Japanese are trying to negotiate with a country that has no concept of truth, telling the truth, truth telling, truth serum, Sojourner Truth, "We Hold These Truths To Be Self Evident", truth or consequences, moment of truth, or even Chinese truth! So really, what did they expect?!

It is now time to jettison this relationship. Why should the Japanese keep giving stuff to NoKo for free and get nothing in return?

Public outrage over the dispute is also fueling calls for Japan to freeze distribution of 125,500 tonnes of food aid, the second half of a promised humanitarian package.

The abductee issue has been a major obstacle to establishing diplomatic ties between Pyongyang and Tokyo, along with concerns over North Korea's nuclear and missile programs.

A decision by Japan to impose economic sanctions -- such as halting cash remittances from Koreans living in Japan -- could derail efforts to resume six-party talks on North Korea's nuclear arms program, analysts have said.

About time someone woke up and smelled the kimchi over there.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 08:02

What Does He Have Against Elections?

This Putin guy is starting to get on my nerves. First he sticks his nose into the whole Ukraine thing and makes a mess and now he is going after Iraq:

Russia's President Vladimir Putin says he has grave doubts about plans to hold elections in Iraq next month.

He told Iraq's interim Prime Minister Iyad Allawi at the Kremlin he could not see how a poll could be held while Iraq was under "full occupation".

Just what the hell does he have to do with it anyway? Is it his citizens getting killed in Iraq (no)? Is it his oil contracts that have been cancelled (yes)? Is it his ideas that are spreading democracy around the world (no)? Is it his country that has lost a lot of the oil for food slush money (yes, maybe, who knows)?

The guy has revealed himself to be a petty dictator not unlike his predecessors and now he has the gall to go around telling other people how to have their elections? What is it we get from this clown, again, that makes putting up with him so important?

He is also a bit schizo:

In a televised meeting between the two leaders at the Kremlin, Mr Putin said: "To be frank, I cannot imagine how elections can be organised when the country is under full occupation by foreign troops.

"I also do not see how you, on your own, can rebuild the situation in the country and keep it from collapsing.

He knocks the foreign troops but then says that the country can't function without them. What a kook!

And then he wants money!!!

However he also expressed support for government efforts to stabilise Iraq, and voiced hope Russian firms could be involved in reconstruction in Iraq.

This guy is all over the place! Screw him and his two-bit thugocracy.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 14:36

It Really Isn't That Hard to Understand

Unless you are some kind of idiot. This guy seems to get it:

"Crosses belong on churches, not in public parks," said lawyer James McElroy, who is representing atheist Philip Paulson in his efforts to see the cross removed. "It doesn't make any difference if it's on federal land, state land or city land. . . . The government should not be in the business of religion."

Duh!

And then we have this illogical person:

"That cross is not just a religious symbol. It's a symbol of coming of age and of remembrance," said Mark Slomka, pastor of Mount Soledad Presbyterian Church, which has been considered an alternate site for the cross.

He said the church would not consider taking the cross until all other alternatives had been exhausted.

"Standing on our property means it stands in defiance of those forces attempting to destroy it," Slomka said. "Otherwise, a cross on church property doesn't mean anything."

"Coming of age and rememberance?" Since when? I thought it was a symbol of when god supposedly killed himself using a cross. And I am not at all sure what his second sentence meant: "Standing on our property means it stands in defiance of those forces attempting to destroy it". No one is trying to destroy is, moron, they are merely trying to move it from public lands owned by the public to private lands where you can pretty much do what you want with it. His third sentence, however gets him a lot closer to my camp: "a cross on church property doesn't mean anything." That is what I have been saying all along!

Here it is in small words: keep you prayers out of my school and your symbols off of my land. It can't be said any more simply than that but the religiods will still have a problem understanding it.
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 13:49

Yours Truly

OK, due to overwhelming demand I have consented to putting up a picture of me and the boys at our recent Fire Training day.

See if you can pick out which one is me:


posted by corsair the rational pirate at 21:51

The Rivalry?

I am trying to score some Vikings-Redskins tickets on eBay for the upcoming Jan 2 game. I find the this entry which causes no end of head scratching:

The rivalry continues ! Watch the Redskins exact revenge. Watch Patrick Ramsey get the passing game going. Watch Clinton Portis go for a 3rd straight 1500 yard season !

I am not sure that this person "gets" football. The Vikings and Redskins rarely, if ever play each other so there is not much of a rivalry. Clinton Portis is running for about 15 yards recently per game so I think he is not going to make 1500 yards (he has 945 now). And what are the Redskins exacting revenge about?
posted by corsair the rational pirate at 10:29

Well, Duh!

I was listening to NPR on the way home yesterday and they were doing a story on the NAACP and Kweisi Mfume (or whatever). The stupid reader lady said the following:

The NAACP is the oldest African American civil rights organization in the world.

Well, yeah! And Beijing is the largest capital of China in the World. And the Washington Monument is the highest freestanding District of Columbia structure in the world. And Mount Fuji is the coolest Japanese volcano in the world.

Doesn't anyone else think that this phrasing is stupid?

(Oh, and the NAACP was started by a bunch of white folks back in the day... with a couple of token black folks, of course

The NAACP established its national office in New York City and named a board of directors as well as a president, Moorfield Storey, a white constitutional lawyer and former president of the American Bar Association. The only African American among the organization's executives, Du Bois was made director of publications and research and in 1910 he established the official journal of the NAACP, The Crisis. With a strong emphasis on local organizing, by 1913 the NAACP had established branch offices in such cities as Boston, Massachusetts; Kansas City, Missouri; Washington, D.C.; Detroit, Michigan; and St. Louis, Missouri.)

posted by corsair the rational pirate at 09:37

Nails it Again

I don't have to agree with everything this guy draws, but I do agree with this one:


posted by corsair the rational pirate at 08:28